Richardine Bartee
Women, from the beginning of time, have been hard on themselves in one way or another. We’re hard on ourselves when it comes to the way we look, when it comes to the way we mother our children, when it comes to what we cook for our families and how we look in the midst of other women, in the job place, on the playground, at the supermarket and when we are on our periods.
Millenial women? Forget it. With the popularization of social media and the pressures of looking good all the time, and at every given moment (for the ‘gram and other miscellaneous offline adventures) or appearing to have it all on our virtual profiles, not only does it induce unnecessary stress, it’s realistically impossible to keep up, be productive and lead a balanced life but we try anyway… and we tend to be our worst critics.
Here are 6 sane, realistic and healthy ways to be kinder to ourselves on a day-to-day basis, when no one is around to cheer you on for looking “regular” and you are not on utopian fleek for Vine or just social media ready, in general.
It’s alright to embrace stress. Sometimes, stress can be good for you. Allowing yourself to learn the differences will make you a better person and your skin will thank you:
Whether we want to admit or not, skin care is very important as it is the soft covering or “meat cloak” we wear which protects all of the amazing things that go on inside of our amazing bodies. Believe it or not, one of the ways to protect our skin is to know the differences between good stress and bad stress, and then applying what we learn from stress management. It is a good way to stay balanced. If good stress or “eustress” is vital for healthy life, we have to stop being so hard on ourselves and celebrate our moments of goodness. As a millenial woman, I’m always working and I tend to forget to enjoy and celebrate my achievements: big or small.
It’s alright to take breaks from appearing like you’re perfect for social media or otherwise. No one is perfect:
Yes, we all want to keep our best face forward and look pretty all time but it’s just not real. Even Kim Kardashian and Beyoncé have their off days and moments. Both of the world’s beautiful women are not waking up with flawless eyebrows, flawless skin or flawless hair every morning – even if one of them claim to be (See Beyoncé’s “I Woke Up Like This”). The fact of the matter is, it is expensive, it is maintenance and it all boils down to the allure of keeping up for the many appearances they are perpetually scheduled for. Being made up is apart of their jobs, and to be frank, this isn’t our realities yet. Let’s allow ourselves to be stunningly beautiful of course, but on a realistic time schedule. Let’s refrain from utilizing valuable and precious time to make yourselves up, just for a selfie.
It’s alright to ask for opinions, constructive criticism and advice from others (peers, sisters, and other women who know you). Allow yourself to be guided. You don’t have to do this alone:
Though we tend to feel alone in our feelings and emotions, we don’t have to. Calling on another millenial woman or someone you trust, that gets you, is a good way to balance out our decision-making processes. We don’t have to be hard on ourselves and go through life alone. Most of the time, talking things out helps us approach things positively.
It’s alright to have a cheat day, when you’re on that diet. It’s actually requested by professional trainers and nutritionists.
Allow yourself to cheat on a diet. Balance is everything:
Ever heard the saying: Too much of anything is not good for you? Yes, the same applies here.
It’s alright to be cranky, when you’re on your period and when you’re off of your period. Allow yourself to be cranky. Sometimes, being cranky is permitted:
We are women, and we’re going through bodily changes, constantly, for a large part of our lives. Be it menstrual, hormonal or pregnancy and post-pregnancy pangs and changes, we are ever-evolving, more than our male consistent or counterparts. If you didn’t know it, we are allowed to express ourselves when feeling blue, irritable or annoying. It is usually a reaction to something that is happening inwardly, which we seldom discuss with anyone in detail, and want relief. We shouldn’t be hard on ourselves or “crank” down the volume because someone else feels like it’s time to call it quits.
It’s alright to be jealous of another millennial woman. I always say being a little jealous is healthy:
Allow yourself to be jealous of another millenial’s achievements or advantages but allow that emotion to aid you in creating your own achievements and advantages. Channeling that emotion into something positive, beautiful and progressive is the best way to deal with jealousy, envy or insecurity. Be the best you, you can be.
